Get Out Of My Way (2006)

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. Douglas Adams

I found out something fascinating yesterday. You can be educated, by the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, for free.

No, I don’t mean the rheotorical you; I mean you. And me. Anybody.

Well not anybody, of course, because not everybody is educable. But there are no entrance requirements, no interview, nothing; they just put the curriculum up on the internet and let you use it. As Lawrence of Arabia says to Ali, pointing across the trackless waste of the Nefu desert towards Aqaba: “It’s just a matter of going.” Simple, really.

Indeed. Now, you’re not going to get to ask anybody any questions, get help from your peers, go to any keg parties, or clap any erasers for brownie points or anything. The stuff is just laying around there. You’ve got to do something with it, no one’s going to show you the way.

Experience is a dear teacher, but fools will learn at no other. Ben Franklin

Now, if you know the vernacular of the 1700s, you’d know that “dear” means “expensive” or “difficult” in that aphorism. And Ben knew what he was talking about, because he was talking about himself, really. He’s one of a long list of people that taught themselves what they wanted or needed to know. Like most auto-didacts, he knew amazing and voluminous things, but there were large gaps in his learning. This is the danger in not having a curriculum set out for you.

I’ve never been able to learn things properly. I always just wanted to be left alone in the library with the information that interested me. But you’ll notice that Ben Franklin didn’t espouse his method of learning, and neither will I. It’s a self-selecting cadre I inhabit, and if you join because you think it’s sexy, you’ll likely make a mess of your life. Try going into IBM and telling them you know the things an MIT education encompasses, but you have no credentials to prove it. The tests you didn’t take online aren’t in the Human Resources person’s desk, either. Grab a broom.

The only real way to learn anything in this world is to do it alongside someone that knows what they are talking about. But the person that knows what he’s talking about is a rare thing, and rarer still is that person that will help you. They’re busy. But sometimes they write it down. And you can learn it from them, even if they’re halfway across the planet, or dead as a Pharoah.

People drop out of college now, and say: “Bill Gates dropped out of college, and he’s rich. No problem.” Believe me, you’re not Bill Gates. If you were, you wouldn’t be looking around to see what other people were doing, and mimicking their approach. Being an auto-didact is a force-play. You run to second base on a ground ball or you’re out. There’s no deciding in it. You are or you ain’t. Bill Gates and his ilk stole second and third and home, and you’re still trying to bunt.

A sympathetic Scot summed it all up very neatly in the remark, “You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk dancing.” Sir Arnold Bax

Regular people make the world go round. By definition, most people are regular people. But if it’s enough for you to have the stuff in your head, because you can use it, and know how to pan through the whole placer to find the glittering dust that’s there in the ore, it’s there now.

It’s just a matter of going.

Things That Keep Me Up At Night

Why is Eric Clapton playing a Percy Mayfield song with a wedding band? Also, why is it that when you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal? And why is it if you tell people that the sun is a fiery furnace of hydrogen, constantly exploding in a fury of fusion energy, they just shrug and believe you; but if you tell them you just painted a doorframe, they touch it to see if it’s sticky?

John Fredrick’s Son (From 2007)

I found this picture in the Library of Congress. The caption is what caught my eye at first, although of course the picture itself is very compelling. The caption reads:

John Fredrick’s son: “Some day we’re goin’ ta have a new house too, an a car like you all.” Saint Mary’s County, Maryland

The picture was taken in 1941. That is a very moving, mundane thing to read. That boy’s father is outside the shack with people helping him to dig a new privy hole and drill a new well far enough apart so that one does not foul the other.

People used to instinctively understand that owning a house that could become a home could in turn could become a catalyst for, or a safeguard of, the only really important institution devised by man: The family.

People often assume I am consumed with nostalgia and am backward looking. I don’t think so. I see people retreating towards barbarism and calling themselves progressive. That’s all. In a very real way, I am living right at the edge of what society and technology allows. And I like it here.

I see the idea of a home that has meaning in and of itself slipping away at all price points. It’s just a rubber box to sleep in and hold the satellite dish for an increasing number of people, and I find that disturbing for cultural reasons as much as aesthetic ones. I hear of people who pay their credit cards and abandon their homes because the homes hold no equity and hence have no intrinsic value, but their credit cards are valuable. But my home, and the home of many others who share my worldview, if perhaps only subconsciously, have intrinsic value that stand alone outside of commerce. It would be a big deal for me to lose my home. It’s not just a box I live in.

That little boy in the picture understood that the way he understood the stove is hot. He did not require a white paper referencing Le Corbusier, Bruno Zevi, Christopher Alexander and Martin Luther King to figure it out.

He knew about the car, too. People used to understand viscerally what it meant, what it really represented. Even a serf knew when he was no longer tied to the land, unable to leave. You are free to go if you must, or you will– but especially if you can.

The desire and ability to stay in one place backed up with the freedom to go if you so desire, or must. The vast majority of us take all of that for granted; or worse, a very vocal minority are actively opposed to it for reasons that boil down to, in a dark unguarded moment: I’ve already got mine, to hell with the rabble.

Resist the assault on all of it, lest your children find themselves in a hellish shack, wishing they had it all back.

I hope you got them, John Fredrick’s son.

The Difference Between Informative And Insightful

Informative:

Insightful:

HOW TO BLOG. LESSON ONE: THERE IS NO LESSON TWO

Unsubstantiated rumor. Epithet hurled at people who mildly disagree with you. Specious argument. Disregard for manners. Balogna. Baloney.

Now insert cut-and-paste research to bolster crabby worldview cadged from monomaniac manipulators, if plain fibbing is unavailable. Charts are best:

Remember, hyperlinks to pointless unedited text are great, but really long strings of URL gibberish that make reader’s browser display funny because they run off the page are always better. When in doubt, it’s best to just paste thousands of words in one big undifferentiated paragraph right in there like a texty skyscraper of unanswerable intellectual doom. Otherwise no one might read it.

Possessive it’s. Possessive it’s. Possessive it’s.
Contraction for it is: its.

Arguement.
Arguement.
Arguement.
Arguement.
Arguement.
Arguement.

Point out spelling is for loosers, you spelling Nazi! I learned critical thinking at Community College! All you can do is spell.

Big bowl of que cue and queue in a mixed salad with bile.

Pie Chart!

Just yell Strawman! over and over. Not sure why.

I hate hate. I hate the hating haters who don’t hate hate like me. Kill the hating haters! Sterilize the hating haters, then kill them and desecrate their graves and dig them up and hate them for hating like that.

One word for you: Hitler!

There are too many people. Something something Darwin. Something something border fence. Al Gore is fat. Rush Limbaugh is fat.

Apocalypse now. Apocalypse then.

You drink the Kool-Aid. I drink from the fountain of truth and wisdom. And Mountain Dew and Red Bull.

Don’t forget: Drop dead! is way too generous a sentiment for anyone you don’t like. They must perish in a conflagration.

Picture of cat, with non-sequitur slogan rendered in mangled syntax, spelling, and in an unattractive font.

Ascribe superpowers and imbecility to the same public personage for the same action. Point out that you’re forced to take Paxil, Prozac, Valium, Xanax, Ativan, Effexor, Zoloft, Zyprexa, Seroquel, Strattera, Ritalin, and Adderall because everybody else is so crazy and neurotic. Then fire up an enormous medical cheeba blunt to calm down.

***Place quote from “The Big Lebowski” here where quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson used to go***

Remind everyone of your threat to move to Canada if the political Zeitgeist doesn’t shape up. Divide yourselves equally between people who will flee to Canada because it’s full of pacifist diversity-minded hippies, or because you’re going to get a job in the 1890s style oil boom economy where people go to the saloon after work with a six shooter on their belt. Never leave your cubicle or your couch, though.

For no particular reason, and with no particular point in mind, finish up the whole thing with:

Sad.

Sippican Cottages And Bungalows

Sippican Cottage Furniture is featured twice in the August/September issue of Cottages and Bungalows. Neato.

I always appreciate the attention. I’m a small business in a ferocious fiscal climate and need to cadge attention where I can get it.

They always send you a complimentary copy. Most everybody in the magazine and television world have been very professional and thoughtful, in my experience. When I was featured on NECN they even sent me a disc with the appearance on it.

I’ve never paid to be featured in magazines or other media. I’ve received some rather creepy overtures in this regard. Some of the surreptitious pay to play arrangements in the big shelter mags, and especially TV, seem like borderline fraud to me. We’ll pretend to like you if pay us. Most of the home improvement shows now have the smell of: “Hey mister, do you want to buy speakers out of the back of my van?” A long time ago, I was hired to testify as an expert witness in a lawsuit against the host of a major home improvement show that was taking kickbacks. It does happen.

I hadn’t seen Cottages and Bungalows until my furniture was featured in it. It’s a really good magazine. There’s something interesting on every page. My wife likes it even better than I do. Many houses are too fussy and sterile for my taste, and I think for the occupant’s taste, too, though they don’t always realize it. We are a casual society. It’s unlikely you’ll be happy living in an operating room.

You can buy a copy at many newsstands or Target, Lowe’s, Wal-Mart, Barnes and Noble, or Borders. Or you can buy a single copy or a subscription here. I know I will. And if anybody buys anything much, I wouldn’t mind advertising there, too. See? They are good businesspeople over there at Cottages and Bungalows, even though they’re honest.

PS: They have a forum, too.

Tag: life

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