You’re a Guru Man, Charlie Brown
January 8, 2025
3 Comments
A Bodhisattva refers to one of the four sublime states a human being can achieve in a lifetime. I think I just discovered the fifth.
You Know, the Internet Used To Be Kinda Fun
September 25, 2024
1 Comment
It really isn’t anymore. It’s been thoroughly roped and branded and gelded and optimized and monetized. Totally infiltrated by bad actors. And speaking of bad actors, the video is full of them. No matter. I hereby testify that there was indeed a time when people found things that they found amusing and stitched them together, and put them out there into the ether for no other reason than for the love of it.
Blast From the Past
June 21, 2023
No Comments
Every video ever made is a requiem mass. You just don’t know it at the time.
Real Men of Genius, Chapter Eleventy-Two: Creatividad con Sencillez
March 7, 2015
2 Comments
The title means: creativity with simplicity. I’m not sure it qualifies, really. If all you’re trying to do is keep the cows from getting out of the enclosure every time someone drives through, it would be much simpler to kill all the cows right away and then eat them.
I’m here to help. If you have a problem that requires creativity with simplicity, let me know. I’ve often overheard people remarking on how creative and simple I am, so it must be true.
Happy New Year From Sippican Cottage’s Spare Heir
January 1, 2015
2 Comments
My eleven-year-old son is the last person on the face of the Earth to produce animations in Microsoft Paint. He may also be the first, but there’s no way of knowing one way or the other. At any rate, Happy New Year to everyone. Hope it’s a good one for you and yours.
I’ve Seen Supreme Evil, And It’s As Cute As A Puppy
October 10, 2013
15 Comments
Ah, pop music. There’s serious money in unserious music. And wherever there’s money, people sense importance.
After a professional football game, which involves around one hundred illiterate and innumerate neanderthals, looped on steroids and ADHD medicine, shoving each other on a striped lawn over possession of a malformed basketball for a few hours, dozens of likewise illiterate and innumerate sportswriters and TV hair farmers push microphones into the players’ faces and ask them their opinions, more than occasionally about topics outside their field of expertise — said expertise solely consisting of fooling a piss test. Such is the end result of lots of money applied to trivial things.
People ask pop singers who should be president, which is much the same. And if a person has a million-seller, you can be sure some intellectual holding down a chair and a sinecure at a university or a magazine will invest that success with the veneer of seriousness. Lady Gaga’s meat dress means something, I can assure you. It wouldn’t mean something if she was playing Debbie Boone covers at the Ramada Inn, but a vapor trail of zeroes makes Goofy into Laika.
I have suffered from the syndrome myself, when I was much younger. I thought pop songs were important. You can get your fun out of taking all the fun out of things if you try. All-night arguments about whether the Dave Clark Five were superior to the Monkees can fill your life with meaning. It’s sad and pathetic meaning, like worrying over a State Senate election, or arguing on the Intertunnel, but it is meaning.
If you see it as just fun, you can make more fun out of it, without worrying overmuch. Mashing E.L.O. and The Supremes together isn’t going to cure cancer, but hey; it isn’t going to cause it, either. Enjoy.
Make It Fonky!
July 31, 2011
3 Comments
I mos def must be the funky! I desire to shake my grooved thang higher! I must melt the hot stax of wax in my ears, and take off to an astral plain! We will, we will, biological clock you in the face! Raise the roofie on the sucker! It’s a crisco inferno! Burn your mother’s down!
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! Let’s put hope in your soul finger! And ebony and Merchant Ivory soap in your hole! Maceo, take me to the bridge of sighs! I wanna take your squier! Good God alrighty! They’re gonna spank that plank like a rented joule! So high, I can’t get over Stitt. So wide, you can’t have it your way, have it your way! Make it fonky!
I Stand Still. The World Turns
July 6, 2011
3 Comments
The Burgular… of Banff…ff…ff takes pictures of whatever wanders by for a year.
Spanners
June 9, 2011
3 Comments
SPANNERS
by: Sippican Cottage
Sun’s beaming in the window,
There’s rumbling from the floor,
We’re swinging and we’re swaying
Boxes dancing out the door.
Oh how our muscles ripple,
We’re making twenty knots,
We’re alternating; current —
We’re glowing with the watts.
Pounding down the corridors,
With Bill of Lading piles;
Our output’s put the boss on ice
We’re blowing out the dials.
They count the beans but can’t keep up,
We’re cooking with the gas;
Our arms are made from tempered steel,
Our heart is made of brass.
That brass is rolled to make a tube,
The tube is bent just so;
And if we blow that trumpet, Jack,
The girls get all aglow.
The whistle blows at five o’clock,
It’s twenty-three skidoo;
The guys and gals that made that stuff,
Go out for dancing too.
They box the compass of the steps
Then swing from chandeliers;
They leave the clerks there in the lurch
Then kick it up a gear.
They pound the floor into the ground,
They swing and then they sway;
They’d drink to all their troubles,
But they’ve long since gone away.
They close the places late at night,
And walk home ‘neath the stars;
Arm in arm, exchanging charms
One’s Venus, one is Mars.
Mighty children spring from them,
To keep the flame alight;
They nurse them with acetylene,
And ultra-violet light.
They grow some whiskers when they’re old,
And sit down for a spell;
Their Ercoles will take their place,
And raise a little hell.
Tag: mashups I wish I’d made
sippicancottage
A Man Who Has Nothing In Particular To Recommend Him Discusses All Sorts of Subjects at Random as Though He Knew Everything.
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