Sit On My Facebook, And Tell Me That You Love Me

I love when people who would think I’m an old fuddie duddie join the Order Of The Old Man That Yells At Cloud. The interesting and influential John Scalzi has seen Facebook, and he’s not happy.

Facebook has made substandard versions of everything on the Web, bundled it together and somehow found itself being lauded for it, as if AOL, Friendster and MySpace had never managed the same slightly embarrassing trick. Facebook had the advantage of not being saddled with AOL’s last-gen baggage, Friendster’s too-early-for-its-moment-ness, or MySpace’s aggressive ugliness, and it had the largely accidental advantage of being upmarket first — it was originally limited to college students and gaining some cachet therein — before it let in the rabble. But the idea that it’s doing something better, new or innovative is largely PR and faffery. Zuckerberg is in fact not a genius; he’s an ambitious nerd who was in the right place at the right time, and was apparently willing to be a ruthless dick when he had to be. Now he has billions because of it. Good for him. It doesn’t make me like his monstrosity any better.

Preach it, brother. I’m constantly bombarded with advice — and just plain demands–to get a Facebook page and Twitter presence going, and LinkedIn requests, and lots of other utilities with problems with spaces between words and capitalization, but I just can’t bring myself to slice my onion any thinner. I recently read an article about an NFL player from a small town in the midwest, and ESPN needed a thumbnail sketch to illustrate how backward the place was, so they pointed out that most of the denizens of this particular benighted place in their mysterious flyover state still had phones that, get this, fold in the middle. They may be pooping indoors now, but they’re not Twittering about it realtime. The horror!

[Update: A møøse once bit my sister –and then accumulated 1000 Facebook friends and lots of lungworms and died.]

Hey, Did You Hear The One About The Italian Scientists That Invented Cold Fusion?

I’m sorry, but I can’t hear the term “Italian scientists” without thinking of a rabbi and a priest going into a bar, or a blonde woman asking for directions, or any number of trite joke openings. It comes from growing up in a town full of Italians, who only told Italian jokes. People used to have a sense of humor about themselves. Now everyone is Woody Allen: If I stub my toe, it’s a tragedy. If you fall down an open manhole and die, it’s a comedy.

Anyway, Italian scientists have discovered cold fusion. Cold Fusion I say! Bully! Huzzah!

Despite the intense skepticism, a small community of scientists is still investigating near-room-temperature fusion reactions. The latest news occurred last week, when Italian scientists Andrea Rossi and Sergio Focardi of the University of Bologna announced that they developed a cold fusion device capable of producing 12,400 W of heat power with an input of just 400 W. Last Friday, the scientists held a private invitation press conference in Bologna, attended by about 50 people, where they demonstrated what they claim is a nickel-hydrogen fusion reactor. Further, the scientists say that the reactor is well beyond the research phase; they plan to start shipping commercial devices within the next three months and start mass production by the end of 2011. (Physorg.com)

My favorite part is when they explain they can’t get their wonder “peer reviewed” because they don’t know why it works. “Peer reviewed” is my favorite blog comment term now, useful for spotting windowlickers on the Intertunnel. Among people who think this, this is what they think. 

I love, love, love the video they have appended to the Physorg article. Their rig looks like a welder and a TV repairman set up shop in the back room of a deli. The scientists should have lied and said it was a Globalistical Warmening experiment, and they could have driven to the press conference in Ferraris, and sat on thrones instead of folding chairs at a card table.


Need cheap energy? Enrico Fermi has a funerary monument in a church in Florence, right next to Galileo and Marconi. Just hook up electrodes to his corpse, and tell him you invented cold fusion but don’t know how it works. It won’t be perpetual motion, but he’ll spin for a good, long time.

Tough Crowd

Ah, the music business. Son, you can play at the ski area, but stay out of Guadalajara. And if they ask for Pájaro libre after last call, for pity’s sake, play it.

The norteño band La Excelencia had just finished their performance at the Vida Divina club in the wee hours of Monday when four intoxicated men carrying weapons demanded that the musicians continue playing. After the group agreed to play two more songs, the club owner called a halt, informing La Excelencia and the remaining patrons that it was closing time.Minutes later, the four gunmen detonated a grenade inside the bar and opened fire on the band. (From FoxNews Latino)

Nothing is obscure on the Intertunnel! Here’s la banda. Perhaps the reporter got it wrong, and the grenade was thrown because they wouldn’t stop, or turn off the strobes.

Hey, wait a minute. Isn’t that a song about a murder? This story is like a Mobius strip.

And “FoxNews Latino”? Really? I’m holding out for FoxNews Italian-Irish. Me and Henry Hill need news, too.

There’s A Term For “Students Who Studied Alone, Read And Wrote More,” But They Dare Not Utter It

CBS News is, as usual, staggering around the landscape discovering their butt with a dim flashlight. Or, more precisely, they’ve discovered the south end of a couple of northbound academics,  who can’t ignore the fact that the largest thing ever attempted by man — the American public school system, joined at the hip to its defective cousin, the Kegger/Science of Harry Potter/Six-figure University Extravaganza — is turning out illiterate dullards. College students not learning much.  The heck you say!

  • A study of more than 2,300 undergraduates found 45 percent of students show no significant improvement in the key measures of critical thinking, complex reasoning and writing by the end of their sophomore years.
    Not much is asked of students, either. Half did not take a single course requiring 20 pages of writing during their prior semester, and one-third did not take a single course requiring even 40 pages of reading per week.
    The findings are in a new book, “Academically Adrift: Limited Learning on College Campuses,” by sociologists Richard Arum of New York University and Josipa Roksa of the University of Virginia. An accompanying report argues against federal mandates holding schools accountable, a prospect long feared in American higher education.

I always love persons academic turning into Sargent Shultz when anyone points out that most children enter college with no measurable intellectual skills, and exit with nothing added but debt. Why is our children dum? Beats me. They certainly get very matter-of-fact if anyone suggests teaching children important objective things in a serious setting and testing them to see if their teachers suck pond water. Accountability smells like the great unwashed to them. Can’t have the peasants demanding results for their quarter mil. Devotees of the modern approach to learning don’t like it when you point out that critical thinking requires knowing things, hard factual things, so you can tell if someone’s pulling your leg or not. They’d rather that critical thinking consist of half-remembering the prejudices of your teacher on cue. But they can’t even get the kids to remember those. Taking that word out of Huckleberry Finn and another hundred billion in school loans oughta do it.

What exactly does the study observe before ruling out the Conclusion That Dare Not Speak Its Name? Here’s a couple things:

  • -Students who studied alone, read and wrote more, attended more selective schools and majored in traditional arts and sciences majors posted greater learning gains.
    -Social engagement generally does not help student performance. Students who spent more time studying with peers showed diminishing growth and students who spent more time in the Greek system had decreased rates of learning, while activities such as working off campus, participating in campus clubs and volunteering did not impact learning.

I know some kids who study alone, read and write more than other students, have more rigorous and traditional course material, and restrict socializing to social engagements instead of robbing it from educational time. They work inside and outside the home and help their neighbors, too, but it doesn’t interfere with their education.

But remember, don’t mention the homeschooling approach to education. Maybe we should call it KinderCollege or something, and avoid some of the sneering. We’re already mailing in the money for the school system and not sending the kids. Not much more we can do on our end.

Month: January 2011

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