Quiet, Numskulls, I’m Broadcastin’

I spent most of the last two days being interviewed on one talk radio station after another. I won’t try to get a copy of the one from this morning a 6:35 AM, but I can approximate a transcript for you if you like:

Host Someone or Other:
GOOD MORNING GREGORY!!!

Me: 
Blearrgghh.
***slurp coffee***

Host Someguy:
IS OBAMA THE ANTICHRIST OR IS BP HITLER?

Me:
I…I.. wat?

Host All Caps:
FASCINATING. IT”S AN OUTRAGE!!!ELEVENTY!!1!!1 NOW FOR THE TRAFFIC

Telephone:
*** Producer hangs up, line goes dead***

Me:
Wat?

At any rate, I’m making a book tour without a book, which is hard. I wrote an article for Pajamas Media, and the whole world looked at it. The Talk Radio gods must be appeased.

According to one radio host, I must be some kind of wild-eyed socialist who wants to nationalize the oil industry and bankrupt the federal government. A couple hours later I was Karl Rove’s pool boy. Me? I just found an interesting story and wrote it down as best I could, same as usual — because the water bill came.

PS: I started a newspaper.

Denny Schaffer on 920WGKA in Atlanta was a hoot, and was pleasant as could be to me while I was on hold.He’s got a podcasts of his show here.

I stole the one I was on. Slide the slider over to 41:30 to hear me utter the syllable “um” more times than Diamond Joe Quimby and Ted Kennedy combined, which they already might be.

Third Rock From The Sun

When Sisyphus was pushing the stone up the mountain,
Always near the top
As you remember, at the very tip of the height,
It lapsed and fell back upon him,
And he rolled to the bottom of the incline, exhausted.

Then he got up and pushed up the stone again,
First over the grassy rise, then the declivity of dead man’s gulch,
Then the outcroppings halfway, at which he took breath,
Looking out over the rosy panorama of Helicon;
Then finally the top

Where the stone wobbled, trembled, and lapsed back upon him,
And he rolled again down the whole incline.
Why?
He said a man’s reach must exceed his grasp,
Or what is Hades for?

He said it’s not the goal that matters, but the process
Of reaching it, the breathing joy
Of endeavor, and the labor along the way.
This belief damned him, and damned, what’s harder,
The heavy stone.

Josephine Miles

Month: June 2010

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