In Furtherance Of My Evil Plan To Resurrect Wichita Lineman And Make It The Official Cover Song Of The Twenty-Teens: The Swinging Doors

We’re bad. But we’re not just nationwide. We’re global now.

We are legion. And we are determined to make Wichita Lineman the song that’s played by the band in the corner at the dive bar, on the juke box at the pizzeria, and played during time outs at football games and water polo matches alike. I want it tastefully arranged with strings and French horn, murmuring from crummy overhead speakers in elevators in Kuala Lumpur, even though I hate French horn and I’m glad they make them shove their hand in there to try to smother the sound.  I want gas pumps to play Wichita Lineman. High School marching bands. I want it to become the opening riff of a Windows start, and an Apple shutdown. I want Lady Gaga to cover it because she’s afraid not to. 

And be warned: I’m gonna come looking for first person that makes a “Rineman” joke, and not with binoculars, either.

Aforetimes: In Furtherance Of My Evil Plan To Resurrect Wichita Lineman And Make It The Official Cover Song Of The Twenty-Teens: Optiganally Yours 

Previously: In
Furtherance Of My Evil Plan To Resurrect Wichita Lineman And Make It
The Official Cover Song Of The Twenty-Teens: Glenn Tilbrook 

Also Sprach Sippican: Another In The Long List Of Songs I Don’t Like That I Like