You can file this under “Why be normal?”

Back when I performed music, we couldn’t take ourselves seriously. It’s already an absurd business down in the weeds where we played for five bucks cover. If you took yourself seriously, you looked twice as silly as if you clowned around. It’s always fun to bend, fold, and spindle songs, especially if you don’t have much talent. It’s even more fun if you do.

Audiences like hearing things played just like the record, it’s true, but they really don’t like it when you enter the uncanny valley of almost. A miss is as good as a mile when the listeners have heard the tune 10,000 times, and named their kids, dogs, and boats using the lyrics. But they like it even better when there’s an element of surprise to go with something familiar.

And with God as my witness, I have played a polka version of Sweet Child of Mine. I’m not proud of that, exactly, but I’m not ashamed of it, either. Why be normal?