I find myself in profoundly straitened circumstances. I won’t bore you with the details. But if you’re inclined to support this little logorrhea farmstand I’m running, I’m going to give you a chance to do it right now. Maybe if I find my way out of the woods I’ll be able to find five minutes to finish that book I started here — and sell you that, too.

Anyway, I don’t have a tip jar, and I’m not starting now. What I want you to do is show enlightened self-interest. The enlightened part is: I end up with your money and feed my children with it. The self-interest part is: you end up with some of my furniture at prices that should make you blush to push the pay now button. If you like me, you should buy it and help me out. If you hate my guts — you should buy twice as much because it’s so cheap it’s like robbing me, really. I’m selling $300 tables for $99 bucks, for example. I’m starting out with ten items, and I’ll be adding more as soon as I can take the pictures and code the website.

It’s all first rate, great stuff, but I’m selling it all for a pittance compared to list. It’s all ready for immediate delivery. If you’ve got a bone handy, now’s the time to throw it: