They have been coached their whole live-long. They are eager to be put on the spot, because they do not recognize it for what it is. They are prepared to flense the hide from another with the edge of their tongue, but no target is proffered. They are put on another spot, one they prefer to keep at home in front of a mirror, cracked. But they warm to their task like devils.
It is a deformed and crazy uncle in the belfry. It must not get out or he will desolate the landscape, entire. They have been coached to say nothing, lest they answer everything. They go to the confessional and eagerly assent that they’ve stolen a pencil they’ve never touched, while the corpses are stacked like cordwood in the secret cellar of their heart. They smile but there’s a dab of lime on their cheek.
They regret everything, except their lack of regret. This they wear like a badge on their sleeve. The cannonballs of life have taken their arm and the sleeve hangs empty; they say it tingles still.
There is only one regret in this world and I don’t have it.
When You are Old
When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;
How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;
And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.–W. B. Yeats
10 Responses
A finer blog I never read.
Regrets? I've done a few things I regret doing in a serious way. Not the "too much tequila" stuff.
But anything really major I might have done differently (ex: USCD instead of Duke) would have arc'd my life differently and I wouldn't have my lovely wife and my three wonderful children.
And I can't regret anything that would have changed that.
_XC
Oh look… here comes Pete Best. Let's ask him…
Ha! Thanks Tom, that made me laugh
Wow Sippican tough question. And given our sound bite interwebs era nobody but nobody can make me sit through a video over 30 seconds long. Unless of course it is you. Good post sir and by the way I'm pushing The Devil's in the Cows again over at my site again (for selfish reasons of course).
Regrets? Can't say, lest I answer everything.
I don't believe most of their answers. I wouldn't tell somebody on the street. Either "none of your business" or some "should have studied harder" B.S. like most of them.
I'm with Bram. Good self-emanination opportunity though Sip, so thanks.
One guy said, "so many…"
My answer, too.
Sleepy Eyes
By Mark Simos
When I feel the weight of all my dreams
Press on me in a cloud
And the ghosts of men I might have been
Gather round me in a crowd
It’s easy to loose faith and say
The way I chose was wrong
'Til I look into your eyes and see
Love deep as the road is long
(Ch)
When the evening stars burn down
And the new day starts to rise
I will shelter in your loving arms
And close these sleepy eyes
These sleepy eyes
When I see old friends from bye gone days
Their hearts still filled with fire
Who never seem to have lost their way
Or bargained their true desire
I think of where I might be now
Had I been of single mind
'Til the long day’s done
And I embrace the one
Sure thing that my heart did find
(Ch)
Performed by Lissa Schneckenburger.
http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/lissafiddle3